LGVE‘! GOOD EGGS
SUCking the blOOd Of pOpUIar enterta'nment Because ghastly creatures dominate
_ A _ ‘ the news. we must always appreCiate " those decent people who make our lives a little bit better. A tiny sample: Jeremy Hardy. Tony Benn. Bobby Robson. John Peel (RIP). Mo Mowlam (RIP). Rabbi Lionel Bloom, Evan Davies. Armando lanuCCi. Stephen Fry. Germaine Greer. Chris Morris. Jacqueline Wilson. Benjamin Zephaniah, Philip Pullman. Vivienne Westwood. We salute you all.
A magical misnomer if ever there was one. 'quick' suggests something you won't be throwing across the room in a rage. ‘Ouick' is something by its very definition that would be ‘easy'. Not bloody likely. Perhaps we're just showing our lack of verbal dextrecery . . . dextricity . . . y‘know. but they are E E S bloody hard. Still. less irksome than I N r .. ,t'thlfi .w- t: 2,»: ~ I Itinnttuiv. - ~: 1 ma ,: .: w «A _s_ I- _ the pointless numbersmithery
Ms. «1 im: w..- t'iii: 1 men \‘.’l l A. l-:"_ ‘ i n ' S Phenomenon that is sudoku. Damn these puzzle setting pedants.
5 WHO SURELY WON AN OSCAR
Well. no actually. This lot may seem like Winners but have never been inVited up on stage to sob and clutch that goldie-lookin' award
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\"Jtitixlf'ii:‘.'."1<:(“minimum 1 Martin Scorsese Robbed more times than a penSioner With a shopping trolley full of tenners. Marty's Goodfe/Ias. TaXi Driver and Gangs of New York missed out on the director's gong because of such delights as Robert Redford's Ordinary People and Dances With Wolves.
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directors to have graced Cinema. Hitchcock was unfortunate to be denied Best Director for Psycho in l961 by Billy Wilder's masterpiece The Apartment. He was eventually lobbed oft Will] an Irving G Thalberg
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.t‘\.‘.'.‘i‘.5; ensure everyone gets a Nl'\."rt'\'7(i:iti.'.i”‘- .iH ("'L K. - ' Richard Burton Nominated seven times. the
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‘ ( ' ' ' unfortunate accolade of the most nominations for a 1' I x 1W“ ‘ ‘ : ' { ' A male actor Without a Single Win.
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' . ‘ . Without ever leavmg With a gong. Close was beaten :}\"titr c". with ":l t‘tit aim or the K ll. : ..:i main" " : :\f-.-' T. at by Cher IO BestActressm1987f0rherrolem V'm‘r“ "M‘W‘w ‘1 tl‘;'>3‘;‘i"\t i ‘ “ ‘ . i ‘L MOO/istruck. This run of bad luck continued when SUC«W"”‘:1dl‘xm' ‘u-“T‘ :1 " (“v-FINE " ~=ii~ ~‘-'i \ .1 1" Closes performance as Marquise de Merteuil in 3“ ik‘v’ldi; 3ft" 1W" NW“ [NW ~3 :3 -'~' J4” '0 1‘ ‘1»1'»'-~= ” Dangerous Liaisons couldn't stop Jody Foster walking warp '71; i‘e' gist: attic" l‘.‘i".l:l 11,”. '-_- I .a f.:.~i'.s- away With the Statue in 1988. lotiom'ig act‘usatci‘s t“ swat r3: lumwira‘“ Txi't"“t.'.i ' «a: 2‘. .«. T'- rier st“? '-:ll‘lk’\‘~it‘ V081" f‘- I‘ 30m" 2.5:; (‘:"".‘:I x: i .:: Federico Fellini The Italian master was nominated Ski's. the first rule Of Fit Club :l .‘t"“'-.'.‘,’. 'titiffiti " i'.:' for an Oscar ten “mes from 1947to1977 without t‘l‘wt‘us“. tttk at‘t‘ut ‘“ .' C..." at me". as; Mus tits :1" wmnmg once. He was eventually gwen the panry opi‘c tan 1;. S‘dtltl"§2 an: :‘-:~ t"t:"‘s-c .z':1 zit f"~.- -.-.:...: ."."w Honorary Award in 1993 the same year in which he \‘.l‘ e \OJ'r‘ .11 i’. l":: 1 my" .‘.."‘.I:‘-':i \ .‘..:¥ "8. '-.- T".:'. dled Of a heart attack. \‘.?‘\ tac- don't sii‘iz‘ ‘. "antes: i‘cix. M 3.1»..- E :w w
celebr.t\ soap. Lsitec at ‘. R..sse' Cm": DJ“ as ‘Mohammedan who xxoudn't see teeming pastry’ MW“ sacret:
12 THE LIST ‘0 "v: .‘ ‘.‘.i'