Lily. 30. has been an escort for a year, working as an “independent courtesan‘ in Glasgow, Edinburgh and abroad. She runs her own technology business and charges £7000 for a minimum of two days' companionship.
‘ never had a particular moral or ethical problem with the I concept of sex for money. Ever since my teens I had thought
vaguely about escorting but something always held me back. By my late 20s. I had a successful career and a very good salary. but was increasingly frustrated by the nine to five routine and had a growing feeling there was more to life. I eventually reached a point when l was sufficiently unhappy to need to take radical action. ()ne of those actions was to at least try the business. as I felt I might look back in later life and wish I had.
‘My clients are high-income individuals. entrepreneurs and company directors for whom the fee is unlikely to intrude upon the pursuit of pleasure. They are mostly mature in age. intelligent. educated and interesting men who treat me with great respect and I enjoy their company. Most have long-term partners or first or second wives. They don‘t want the complications of a mistress and seek out my services. I have strict screening procedures as I see very few. highly select gentlemen. I don't do fetish or BDSM and I don't do couples. 1 have one very close friend who is aware of what I do and supports me.
‘I have other ways of making money and could stop my companionship activities tomorrow if I chose. A lot of escorting in Edinburgh and Glasgow is brothel. sauna and agency-based. which wasn‘t a route I wanted to go down. I talked to other women and researched how to operate safely. screen clients and handle financial transactions.
‘1 am single by choice and miss nothing about being in a relationship. My life is operated exactly how I want. and l have great peace of mind. The biggest benefit ofthejoh is the time it leaves to pursue other things.
‘1 lead a double life and that can be draining sometimes. You have to emotionally distance yourself from your clients. but that doesn‘t mean that when you leave them after a few days spent together. you are not walking on air as if you had just left a lover. In my emotional annoury l have always had an ability to share an intense one-to-one relationship and then walk away without a backward glance.
‘I‘m glad I waited until later life till I entered the business. It means I have the life experience to make a fully infomied decision about the work and what [ am. and am not. prepared to do.‘
22 THE LIST 2—16 Feb 2006
19. Decorate your flat exactly as you want it No female in tl‘e hcuse ‘.'.’hj. not Loner the obligatier
‘rrragrrolia and .‘.hi'e' with a tin of digit}
green paint. move the fridge .‘.lliill‘i reach of \, our "laxy -bov I and plaster your bedroom wall '.‘.|ill ri<__>sters of lien
Maiden and ACDC')
20. Learn to play poker And bet your life savings.
21. Become a deepthroat Sleepless in Sudan is the blog of a da/ed and confused aid worker in Darfur (sleeplessinsudair. blogspot. com/l. while inspiration for survrving a more typical nine to five grind is found at Call Centre Diary (callcerrtrediary. blogspotcoml. Random Acts of Reality chronicles ambulanceman Tom Reynolds trying to kill as few people as possible. and is grim and humorous by turns (randorrrreality.blogwarecorn). while writer. stripper. Cambridge graduate and illegal alien Mimi blows Manhattan Wide open at (mimi newyorkblogspot. corn/l.
22. Be grumpy on buses Tut loudly and repeatedly when someone begins a long and inane conversation With their partner on public transport.
23. Start your own business Thea Newcomb. a thirtysornething DJ in Glasgow. turned her break-up into soyouvebeendumpedcom. which
has since spawned several books.
‘l'd had a marriage that lasted three and a half years. then I rebounded straight into another relationship for three and a half years. and in both cases I think I was dumped for someone else. Then the third one dumped me with a line of: "I can totally fall in love with you but I'm thinking of becoming a priest." And I didn‘t even know he was religious.
I came up with the idea of soyou‘vebeendumped as a way of channelling all my pain into something positive. The Site's appeal is that people from 16—60. men or women. gay or straight. can share advrce. It's a global support group.”
24. Get positive revenge 'lt's not ab0ut putting nudie pics of your ex up.‘ disclaims Newcomb. Bitch about your former beau. share advice on satisfaction exaction and sell your story to a magazine.
STRICT ING URES
VERY FEW, I
HLY SELECT GENTLEMEN'
'I HAV SCREE PROC AND
25. Be a loner l ind lllt‘t"
rententrrrent through spiritual solitude
26. Get a tattoo and/or intimate piercing And dull". tell anvorre
27. Explore the world It's :‘m inuth easier to travel on voui can lerget those dreary arguments about whether to stick around on the beach. or to Visit some improving culture It you l‘tll aside the trir‘kv business; of dining alone in restaurants. there’s nothing to
beat travelling alone
28. Learn rude words in French lhe best plan to find them is lll Hide This french Book. one of a new series of titles by publishers Berlit.’ focusing on a varietv of Luiopean languages Then suggestions include ‘N'oulilie pas tes inenottes' iDon't forget your handcuffs) and ‘Je voudiais une epilation du maillot' il'd like a bikini wax.)
29. Get a reputation Revel in your non—attached notoriety. Asa dangerous package at any dinner party. delight your coupled friends With tales of spur of the moment |iVing. Flirt shamelesst and drink like you don't need to drive a babysitter home afterwards Because you don't.
30. Be a vigilante As a superhero. you must protect your identity and can never be close to mere mortals.
31. Join the anti-heroes famous singletons include Jairies Dean. Odysseus. Walt Whitman, Linily Dickinson, Nelson Mandela, Cliff Richard. Joan of Arc and Morr ssey. All happy. well-adiusted folk.
32. Save the planet There's no reason to inflict your rnewling offspring on this overcrowded planet anyway. Relo1ce in the thought of a child growrng up yet never disturbing Sunday morning lie-ins by sponsoring one through ActionAid (actionaidorg) for JUSl 50p a day. ActionAid helps over 13 million peOple in 42 developing countries. fighting
hunger and HIV. educating, supplying emergency aid and promoting women's rights.
33. Learn a musical instrument Insulate your flat and practise the vrolin in the middle of the night.
34. Experiment with transvestism
35. Volunteer You don't need a loved one to venerate yOur altrUistic deeds. iust that warm glow of moral Superiority. The Volunteer Centre Glasgow is located on 84 Miller Street (0141 226 3431). while Volunteer Centre Edinburgh is at 45 Oueensferry Street Lane (0131 225 0631).