On screen, we’ve seen him chuck his guts up after a burger and fries frenzy, while off screen, he’s worked as a stand-up comedian, having been rejected five times by the University of Southern California Film School. MORGAN SPURLOCK is having the last laugh now, but what joke was he the butt of in his formative years?
Which time in history would you love to have Hvedin?
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What’s the longest time you’ve slept soundly in one go over the last five years? ' "i' "’V swgmi gjii’t'"-':"rll Li"'il .'./(:-iil it) 'i’jsrfa, .'.'(3(‘:k(?llfl Y'iim: rlayf; thaiil .-:::' rl'l’l a "art. munch has just What was the last thing you stole? ?" ' ,:,,i .‘.?l‘. ll f,’)'i(;fjf}. ili(;i(:‘.'/at;a ':- " 4'. .'.r.- iii-v: fr '.r and (Hit: r>f its; .voulrl
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What’s your least favourite country?
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Rear View ANSWER MACHINE
I love Rio de Janeiro but I had such a terrible trip to a film festival in Blale. The directors had to unload all their own boxes and carry things to the hotel. We were like: ‘Dude. don't you have people who work for the festival that could do this?’
How many times a day do you look in the mirror?
Because I'm IoSing my hair now. I can‘t go past a mirror WithOuI looking in, just to make Sure that the ones I had haven't jumped ship yet.
If you could quit your job and start afresh tomorrow and have the skills to do something completely new, what would you choose to do?
Wouldn‘t it be great to be a musician? My girlfriend bought me a banjo a few years ago and I‘ve done such a terrible job at practicing. So, if tomorrow I could just magically be able to play that. dude. there‘d be no more movies; I’d be straight on the road. A lot of peOple don’t know it but Steve Martin is a great banjo player and though I‘d love to meet him. I don‘t ever want to until I can play the banjo.
Your house is on fire, loved ones and pets are safe. You have a chance to go and retrieve one thing, what would it be?
It would probably be my computer; it has so much stuff on it. so many thoughts. If all that went. it would be like someone killed my puppy.
What’s the punchline to your favourite joke? There are so many great West Virginian jokes which I was on the receiving end of for so many years and it's probably one of those: ‘Well, what do you expect? She's your sister.‘
What song would you hate to be played at your funeral?
‘The Macarena'.
What’s your favourite biscuit?
My mom makes great chocolate chip cookies. What would be your ideal birthday present? | just bought Alex a motorcycle for her 30th. so I think it would be great to get a motorcycle for my birthday. A big Harley Davidson.
When did you last laugh out loud while reading a book?
Just before the film of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy came Out in the States. I re-read the book. It is so funny. dude. There were so many times when l was busting out laughing.
Can you cook?
Alex would be the first person to say that I can’t, but I'm getting better. I'm really good at presentation. I want to get better at omelettes because I want to start flipping them. That‘s a real skill.
Who would you like to see playing you in the film of your life?
I really like John C Reilly; he's a great actor and our hairlines are having a race.
What’s your lucky number?
Seven. l was born on 7 November. 1970, so that has been lucky for me. And 25, too. but mainly seven. Actually, there are a few: 13. 21 and 25 have all been lucky. but seven is definitely the one. When did you last dance?
We danced in Mexico. But not the Macarena. How big do you tip in restaurants?
My mom used to say: ‘Never go out with a bad tipper‘ so I try and be a good tipper. For me. it‘s usually 20%.
What’s your all-time favourite sitcom?
I grew up in a house where we had healthy doses of Monty Python. though that wasn't really a sitcom. I love Allin the Family with Archie Bunker. When did you last cry?
The other week I spoke at my niece‘s graduation
at the same high school I graduated from 16 years ago. So, she introduced me and was talking about the things she remembered growing up and what I meant to her and as she was talking. dude. I just teared up. | just about held them back as I stood up but there were a couple of trickles there.
Are you a cat or dog person?
I love both, but we have a cat at the moment. When we get more space, we’ll get a dog. And I don‘t want to have a little piece of a dog. I want a real dog. We just need a place where we can open up the back door and say: ‘Go take a shit.‘ I don't want to have to pick it up by hand, the way you do in your city.
I Don't Eat This Book is Out now. published by Penguin; Super Size Me is Out on Tartan DVD.
DENTIST'S DRILL
Generous career packages are to be offered to dentists to relocate to Scotland and help fill the gap in our dental health services. Here is a guide to looking after your pegs until they arrive.
I Go electric Despite recent (mostly fraudulent) reports that 82% of teenage girls only use their electric toothbrushes to pleasure themselves, the good old electric toothbrush is still the best way to get rid of unwanted plaque.
I Floss Dental floss is an ancient invention. Researchers have found dental floss and toothpick grooves in the teeth of prehistoric humans. Levi Spear Parmly (1790-1859). a New Orleans dentist. is credited with commerCialising modern dental floss. He promoted teeth flossing with a piece of silk thread in 1815. Since then a few people have almost strangled themselves on the stuff but few still know how to use it.
I False teeth False teeth date back to 70080. The Etruscans designed them out of ivory and bone and they were secured into the mouth by gold bridgework. When the National Health Service was brought in after WWII, one of the first free services it offered was the total removal of all teeth and a free set of falsies. That service is still available. I Novocaine Everyone knows that Novocaine is good for the soul. The first local anesthetic used in dentistry was cocaine. introduced by Carl KOller in 1884. Researchers soon began working on a non-addictive Substitute. and German chemist Alfred Einkorn introduced Novocaine in 1905. Originally developed for military use. it was never actually used in the field. However. it did become popular as an anaesthetic among dentists. And that's why we put up With them, whether they be Swedish, Finnish or plain old Jocko.