TO CHAV AND CHAV NOT Black and white and ned all over
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the posh papers have finall‘, awken up to the .‘.'hole Billlitjll‘, baseball capped chax phenomenon. The catalyst for this headlong hroadsheet interest in ,ouths of limited verbal skills is the publication of a book of ".vords
/ arpers; and Shroorners.‘ The language Report I)‘, Susie Dent. Dent's book features ftil '.-./or'ds thought to sum up the age in which they appeared of which. terrifyinglv chav is the nominee for 200-1. lntenxiewed in The Guardian. Dent ra regular in Countdowns Dictionan. Corner“. said of chav: ‘I think it's a really horrible word, but if is gurte a good example of a word that has burst out onto the scene.‘ There's even some chattering debate as to where the l)ux/word-of—the—vear rernphaticallv not to be confused with our own Scottish 'Ned" originates. According to The Guardian the lerrn 'is thought to have come from the mid 19th century Romany word chau. meaning child. while The Scotsman offered the even more unlrkel, livpothesis that chav is an acronvrn of 'Councrl House Violent'. Dissenting readers may feel hacks from hroadsheet for even ‘compact'i newsparms have no business looking down their patronising pens at those less comfortava remunerated than themselxes Naturally. we couldn't l)t)8t3ll)l\ comment.
FATS OFF TO BRIDGET Never mind the quality — feel the width I After its glitzy London opening, does anyone care if the Bridget Jones sequel The Edge of Reason is any good? No? Neither, it seems, does the country’s press. Those dogged showbiz columnists bedevilling the rain-soaked red carpet at the film’s British premiere couldn’t have given a pair of giant pants for Bridget’s amorous conundra, being much more concerned with picking over the fleshless bones of star Renee Zellweger’s fluctuating weight. The Daily Telegraph drew
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SMOKING What a drag!
I The Scottish Executive's proposed ban on smoking in public places had
been so blaringly trumpeted that the McConnell barely qualified as news. headlines that followed McConnell's outdoing themselves to invent some goes to The Record. whose front pa
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‘lt’s become commonplace and dull to say they are the band of the year. But they bloody are.‘
‘If I look like as good as Susan Sarandon one day, I’ll run naked down Fifth Avenue.‘
‘lt’ll be an upmarket Spinal Tap. And it’ll be one of the funniest things on TV for a while.’
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‘It was more of an act. Albert was saying that Keith Richards, even when he’s sober, probably acts like that. But we still get nervous onstage. We shit our pants.’
announcement by First Minister Jack Much more eye—catching were the statement: sub editors across Scotland inspired baccy~related puns. Top prize ge featured a fag packet hearing the
‘I know she fancies me and I would like the world to know that I fancy her back.
legend ‘lllegal Kingsize'. The Herald led with ‘Lights Out For Public Smoking i 1... ,. , , I. ; .. i while The Mirror plumped for ‘Smoke ‘em Out“. Who'd have thought
stubbing out smoking could be so much fun?
I Meanwhile, The Dundee Courier conducted a vox pop among drinkers in city pubs and found opinion divided. The paper articulated the view of many a ‘social smoker’ calling the Executive’s
proposals ‘unworkable’ because
Scotland - it goes hand in hand with a drink’. But the Courier did
stumble across one proactive pu
Club Bar. ‘We’re planning to put a canopy outside with aluminium
barstools in case drinkers want t
thinking indeed, but Mr Martin had better make sure that a collection of chairs beneath a canopy doesn’t constitute a ‘public place’.
attention to the fact that Zellweger gained 20lb to play the part in a De Niro-esque piece of method acting preparation. More charitably, The Daily Record gushed at the fact that the ‘stunning’ 35-year-old
‘I don’t drink at all. I can say that now I’ve done two years of the John Smith’s ads. They told me to keep that little fact quiet. But I do love my Baileys. Got to have Baileys when I’m sat back watching The X Factor of a Saturday night.’
‘too many people smoke in blican, Steve Martin at the city’s
0 go out for a smoke.’ Smart
thesp, who embarked on a diet immediately after the film wrapped, had shed the said 20lb and could now slide comfortably into a red dress by British designer Marchesa. So, should the late Dr Atkins take credit for Ms Zellweger’s svelte new figure? No way! The actress told The Mirror: ‘I am definitely not an Atkins girl. This is the real me, this is my figure. I have a nutritionist to get fat but the minute I stop stuffing my face it drops off.’ Interesting concept that: a nutritionist who actually helps you pile on the pounds . . . (Allan Radcliffe)
Whats Peter's friend?