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The past is boring, not to mention chock full of war and disease. as anyone who took GCSE history will be all too aware. Look to the future and the present say the team behind Ultima. Jaclr Mottram finds out what they’re on about.

So what's the deal here? There are very few among us who did not greet the new millennium with a sense that we had been cheated by time. What happened to the doors that go ’whoosh'? Where are all the jet bikes? Iley, I ask the questions. Sorry. Help is at hand for those with a taste for the current and the futuristic. Twitch and the aptly named GK Machine have tired of clubs offering retro solutions to the jet bike deprived set or stale, formulaic house and techno for those stuck in a late 20th century rut. Ultima is set to feature strictly forward-looking sounds drawn from the 21 st century; the best of now, if you will.

That’s a bit vague, isn't It? The music in Alaska’s main room is set to take in predominantly 4/4 sounds, with an emphasis on tracks that stray from the norm while maintaining a solid tune. Effectively, wiggy tunes that still get your toes tapping.

Interesting. That's not all. In keeping with the futurist aSpirations, the traditional record players are set to be augmented with a battery of gadgets and a laptop to add samples and effects to the mix and generally keep the crowd on its collective toes.

That's a lot of toe action - it sounds way cool. Indeed, and it gets better. Plans are forming at Ultima to do away with the 12105 altogether later in the year, with samples, tracks, and a battery of programs for manipulating sound stored on a hard drive. The reasoning being that there is no point carting about a load of heavy records like a luddite, only to limit sonic possibilities by playing them on a data retrieval system that has barely changed in a century, when you will eventually be able to carry your entire record collection and a full spec. studio around in your palmtop. And that's nearly as good as a jet bike.

I Ultima is at Alaska on Sat 8 Apr.

72 THE US! 30 Mar—13 Apr 2000

EDINBURGH THURSDAYS: CLUBS continued

I In The Groove at Jazz Joint. 10pm—3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. DJs Lewis, Fawaz and Sli Si alternate on the decks, with the Freddie King Quartet on 6 Apr and FourStrokeFive reunite on 13 Apr. One of the cit ’s favourite clubs.

I Love Brea s at P0 Na Na. 11pm-3am. £2. Weekly. 15 Simone and Dr Jon play new and old classics from the realms of Latin, soul, R&B and disco.

I Night For Mozambique at The Bongo Club. 8pm—3am. £4 before 9pm; £5 after. 15 April only. All proceeds to Emergency Charity, with Djs George T, Joseph Malik, Allan Dunbar and live bands.

I The Money Shot at The Bongo Club. Monthly. Next date 20 Apr.

I Perception at The Venue. Monthly. Next date 20 Apr with Kev Wright (Sublime) guestin .

I The Squalor S ow at EZK . 11pm-3am. 6 Apr. Fortnightly. Wild- style cabaret-based antics with DJs Babes and Frosty playing hip hop, funk and real disco on four decks.

I 3 Piece Sweet at E2K. 11pm—3am. £3. 30 Mar & 13 Apr. Fortnightly. Sally F, Trendy Wendy and Nicci throw a musical party for us. Much cheapness on the door with plenty of cheap sauce inside, this is a highly recommended early start to your weekend.

I Windup at Bar Nego (Negociants). 8pm—3am. £3 (£2). Weekly. The finest hip hop and R&B with pro DJs Extra and Archie.

Chart & party

I The Ark at The Ark. 10pm—3am. £4 (£2). Weekly. Mind-melting drink promos and full-on party music to take you into the wee hours.

I Back To Basics at Why Not? 11pm—3am. £5. Weekly. Favourites from the chart crypt.

I Blast at Gaia. 10pm—3am. £3 (£2). Weekly. Student soiree featuring intergalactic dance from across the solar system and lo fi/indie from Planet Earth. I Bubbalicious at Club Mercado. 10.30pm—3am. £4 (£3 with flyer). Weekly. A student night at this very gorgeous venue with Vince Stilton the Cheesemaster and suitably discounted bevvy.

I Funky Underground at Revolution. lOpm-3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. The student night at this giant venue with Daddy Cool laying on the fromage.

I Ignition at Eros/Elite. 9pm—3am. £3 (£2). Weekly. New venue for the mainstream party crowd. Big student night.

I The Kangaroo Klub at The Citrus Club. 11pm—3am. £2. Weekly. A new dance and chart club.

I Loca at Loca. 8pm—3am. Free entry before 11pm; £2 before 1am; £4 after. Weekly. A commercial mix of chart, dance and disco.

I The Subway West End at The Subway West End. 4pm—3am. £1 (free to students). Weekly. DJs playing chart music for a drinking crowd.

I Thursday Night Fever at The Liquid Room. 10.30pm—3am. Students free with matric card before 12.30am or in 705 costume; £3 otherwise. Weekly. ‘Slick- ass funk and disco all night’ for those that wanna go-go.

EDINBURGH FRIDAYS

Pro-club

I Bannermans at Bannermans. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. Underworld vibes from Sean Pearson and Neil Ferguson doing the garage and house thing.

I Cuba Norte at Cuba Norte. lOpm—lam. Free. Weekly. Flamenco Puro pla live. DJs afterwards.

I The F y Bar at The Fly Bar. 9pm-1am. Weekly. 31 Mar sees DJ Eric guest at this very pOpular yet laid-back bar; 7 Apr sees the infamous Underworld crew do what they do.

I The Friday Feelgood at Baracoa. lOpm—lam. Free. Weekly. Fri brings a

CLUB OPENING Disuko Edinburgh: E2K, Sat 7 Apr.

Brainchild of one Malks Macbeth, Disuko (meaning disco in Japanese) experienced a traumatic first term. The funky, but still deep, house night first opened its doors last June at The Honeycomb; unfortunately it was a Thursday and bad timing for the venue which was then taken over by the Festival. Moving to a more profitable monthly Friday night slot at Wilkie House in September, hopes of a happy new home soon were dashed. After only three dates, money got too tight to mention and before they knew it, it was Christmas and Disuko were out on the streets.

Before you break out the Kleenex, take heart, because there's a reason for this article. They're back with a

Neil McDonald: 'for real'

new monthly residency at EZK and their brief homeless spell has only made their special brand of superior house music all the more potent. Macbeth is joined at the helm by the irrepressible Muzik Bedroom Bedlam winner Murray Richardson, and while the former likes his house funky, French and up front, Murray plays it deep and with a little bit of tech. Too much house for you? Downstairs chez the Disuko Opium Den, residents Babes and Frosty

serve up hip hop and funk.

The new look Disuko was relaunched last month at an invite-only party where nigh on 500 potential punters turned up to sample the goods. Costly, but hopefully rewarding, the Dis and promoters Tom Mason and Rob Henderson (of Barry Cabanas fame) spent over £1000 decorating the venue and creating the distinctive kitsch Japanese theme look with wall coverings, perspex panels, strobe effects, bamboo and giant origami cranes. This meant all on board pitching in, or as Macbeth puts it: 'We locked ourselves in until

we got cabin fever.’

This month, Disuko will open ‘for real' to a paying audience with up-and- coming local DJ cum producer Neil McDonald showcasing his latest material.

(Catherine Bromley)

change of policy to the normally salsa- orientated bar, as the wonderful DJ Trnku plays an eclectic mix ofjazz, funk, soul and hip hop.

I The Gilded Saloon at The Gilded Saloon. 6pm—lam. Free. Weekly. In Demand DJs offering smooth grooves.

I Immersed In Music at Pivo. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. Harri (Subculture) pops by on 31 Mar. As for Apr, well they’ve not yet decided, expect local DJs of note.

I Made In Iguana at Iguana. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. The practically legendary Jo Malik takes to the full spectrum of world music at this funky bar.

I NYC at Bliss. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. Championing all types of American house, 31 Mar sees Craig Smith throw an In Demand bash and there doesn’t seem to be a date after that until the end of Apr. I 02 at Oxygen. lOpm—lam. Free. Weekly. Craig Smith and Gareth Sommerville on rotation, which equals garage and house.

I Rebel Waltz at City Cafe 2. 9.30pm-1am. Free. 7 Apr. Fortnightly. Resident in ascendance Murray Richardson returns from his tour of the States to remind everyone just how good a house DJ he is.

I Roadblock at Po Na Na. 11pm—3am. £3. Weekly. Nicci digs up the best in funk, disco, house, timeless gems and block rocking beats.

I TFI Friday at Club Mercado. 5—10pm. Free. Weekly. Good old-fashioned after- work mayhem, hosted by everyone’s favourite good time girl, Trendy Wendy. I What It Is at City Cafe 2. 8pm-1am. Free. 31 Mar. Fortnightly. Bob Cairns doing the jazz, soul and funk thing.

Club

I Al's Allnight Jokeshop at The Bongo Club. 10pm-3am. £8 (£6). 1 Apr only. Live TV in a club with bands, DJs and

other goin 5 on. Mad.

I Anoma as at The Wee Red Bar. 10pm—3am. £5 (£4). 7 Apr only. A night of funky electro, Detroit techno and drum & bass.

I Apex at Studio 24. lOpm—Sam (the). £7 (£5). 31 Mar. Monthly. Utilising two floors, Apex go all out to celebrate their second birthday tonight with seven hours of hard house, acid trance and techno. Biomechnoid will be playing a live techno/hard trance set, joining the Sativae Drummers as well as the full resident line-up of Steve Pace, Al Space, Medicine Man, Phil Zero, Julz, Kam the Beard and Neil T. See preview.

I Arakataca! at The Bongo Club. Monthly. Next date 28 Apr.

I Barry Cabanas at E2K. 11pm—3am. £6 (£5); £4 in fancy dress to the theme. 31 Mar. Monthly. It’s another party, this time brought to you by the letter P. I hope my pineapple-sized pimples clear up in time, so I can prance about E2K like the ponce I really am, perving on pretend DJs all night long. There’ll no doubt be loads of porn stars, people with pigtails, a few pathetic pillow fights and maybe even a pipe smoking pirate. Phew, I’m pooped.

I Big Beat at The Bongo Club. 10.30pm-3am. £5. 14 Apr. Monthly. A residents’ night starring the very talented Simon, Stuart and Tinku playingjazz and funk from right around the world. A very popular night of dancefloor sounds.

I Chimera at The Vaults. 10.30pm—3am. £10 at door; £8 in advance. 3] Mar only. A one-off night aiming to throw a damn fine party in aid of charity. The main attraction will be the fab line-up of local talent - Alan Joy (Joy), Kev Wright (Sublime) and Gail Sellars (Shebang) in the main room; Paul Curran (Lift), Martin Valentine (Taste) and Julz (Loop) through the back. Adding ambience to the whole shindig will be the free massage,