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18 The List IS Dec 1995-” Jan 1996
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THIS WEEK WILL BE THE BEST . OF YOUR LIFE MAN. THE PLANETS ARE LINED UP SWEETER THAN A ROW OF TOTTIE AT A NUDIST CAMP BEAUTY CONTEST
MONDAY Auntie Ethel runs off with a toyboy.
leaving you her Newcastle United season ticket.
if TUESDAY You'll be chased round the town by a
blonde stunner. Don't be put off by her uniform, wait till you see what she can do with her handcuffs.
71‘? WEDNESDAY Your collection of old NBA beer
labels is bought by the Gitty Museum for a truckload of cash.
* THURSDAY Red Hum, your three legged whip-
pet. romps in at 66-1. In a horse race.
if FRIDAY New iob ofler- taste tester at The
Newcastle Breweries. Hours to suit yourself.
‘1‘? SATURDAY Take a hint-do the lottery. A ‘2? SUNDAY Sleep off lottery win celebrations.
Britain's biggest bottled beer