Willis. Roseanne Barr and l)anion Way’ans. is’l mins. See review. (ilasgoyy: (‘annon (‘larkston Road. (‘annon 'lhe Forge. ()deori. Salori. [zdiriburglr Dominion. ()deori. l‘(‘l. (‘eritralz Allanpark.(‘aledoniarr (aiirioii. Strathclyde: ('aririori. ()deon ;\y r. ( )deon llamilton. La Scala. l'('l (‘ly’debank. l "(‘1 East Kilbride.

I Meet the Applegatesr 15 i 1 Michael Lehman. 1S. 1990) l€d Begley Jr. Stockard (harining. (‘aiiii(‘ooper. Dabriey (‘olemaii 83 mins. l.ehriian's follow-up to the wonderfully black comedy Heathers is an off-beat satirical comedy about the green riiov eiiient's struggle against coiisurnerisrii. Posing as an oriicry . rind-Western family led by blue-eyed patriarch Begley . the Applegatcs are in fact a gang of giant Bra/.iltari insects charged with the

suby ersiyc ditty of extinguishingthe

eriv ironriientally unsound human race. But of course. the teriiptatiorisol American dccadericc can be seductive. .. (ieritle satire with a shiny underbelly. Edinburgh: Pilriihouse.

I Memphis Bellet llltfvllcliael (‘atori-Jories. l‘K. 1W“) Matthew Modine. liric Stoltl. llarry ('oririick Jr. lllti mins. 1943. and the bray e crew ofthe B- 1 " bomber .lieni/i/irfiy Bel/e hay e one more riiissiori to get through before they reach the target of tw erity -fiy e coriiplcted runs which yvill enable them all toreturri home as heroes. Yet there's still a lot of dangerous sky betw een them and their goal. Predictable. occasionally

oy er-calculating return to theschoolboy heroics of another time. although the filmmakers integrity in reriiainirig true to the harrowing experiences of the riiariy young flyers who lost their liy es manages to save the film from being just another so-w hat Saturday night special. (‘eritralz MaeRobert .-\rts ( ‘entre.

I Metropolitan l 15) l\\hit Stillman. l 'S. 1‘18‘})(‘arolyn l‘arina. Iidward Clements. (hristoper liigemaii. lay loi‘ Nichols. ‘18 mins. Reyvorkirig of Jane Austen iii modern New York. where a collection of 'l 'hbs‘ ( l 'i‘bari llaute Bourgeoisie) exchange urbane. ironic banter on the three l.s life. love and literature. lritelligeiit. iiieditatiy e satire lrorii precocious new comer. (ilasgow: (il’l’. l‘ldinburgli: l‘ilriihouse,

I Miami Blues ( lb') ((ieorge .-\ rniitage. l'S. WW1) .-\lec Baldwin. l'l'ed \Vard. Jennifer Jason l.eigh. 1)" riiiris. l’orriiula cop thriller meets social satire iii Arriiitage's ambitious but not wholly successful parody . which attempts to expose the shallow'riess of l'loridasociety and glossy police drama. l§iitlitisittstic‘;illy quirky perforriiances frorn Baldwin as the hood. l.eigh as his happy hooker and Ward as the exasperated cop on their tail can't compensate for a basic lack ot'drive in the plot and pacing. ltdinburgh: (‘ameo

I Miller‘s Crossing ( lsi (Joel court's. 1‘)‘)l))(iabrie1By'rrie. .»\1bertl*iriney. MarciaUay llarderi.Joliri'l'ur'turro..lori Polito.J,Ii. l-‘reemari. 115 mins, 'l'he (‘oeii Brothers' latest optts is a predictably quirky-but-stylish reworkirigofgenre material in this case the gangster flick, Set in an unnamed liast-coast city in the 193(1s. it centres on thefalling-out between mob-leader FililiL‘y and his right-hand man Byrne when both take a shine to the same broad (llarderi). lt'sall carried out with the Coen's customary aplomb. and even features a fleeting appearance by El 1'! Dead and [)urkmun director Sam Raimi. Edinburgh: Cameo. I My Universities ( PG) (Mark Donskoi. L'SSR. 194(1) Alexei Lyarsky . Varvara .‘ylassalitinova. Mikhail 'l‘roianovski. Dariiil Sagal. 11H mins. Final partof Maxim (iorki's autobiographical trilogy. as filmed by Doriskoi oy er three years. In this instalment. the iriipov erished .-\1exei (l.yarsky ) attempts to pay his way through further education. working for a callous

22 The List 22 March 4:\pri1 W91

FILM

LOOK WHO’S TALKING T00

Look Who‘s Talking T00 (12) (Amy Heckerling, US. 1990) John Travolta, Kirstie Alley. Elias Koteas. the voices of Bruce Willis, Roseanne Barr. 80 mins. Loath as one obviously is to succumb to the wave of Vic Reeves-ism currently sweeping the land, the lads twin catchphrases ‘You just wouldn't let it lie‘ and ‘Very poo-er‘ seem maddenineg appropriate at this juncture. Rushed into production about ten minutes alter the producers realised the original was going to make a packet, this exasperatingly dufl wisecracking baby sequel/reprise could mark some sort oi new low in the turgid dreck Hollywood is prepared to throw at people in the desperate hope olmaking money.

This time Alley and Travolta have not one but two comedy infants on their hands. ourold friend Mikey, whose lip movements now clearly fail to match the scripted inanities voiced by Bruce Willis. and new arrival Julie. who even in the womb has Roseanne Barr verbally mugging away on her behalf. And that is virtually the extent of the invention on show, lorthere ain‘t exactly much of what we in the trade

call a ‘plot‘ to go with it. When a director has to throw in lame montages cut to the sounds of well known pop ditties once too often for comfort and the action highlight ofthe entire movie has dearest Mikey coming to terms with MrToilet Man forthe first time. you know you‘re in trouble.

Badly overstretched at a mere 80 minutes, from first to lastthis crummy offering seems constructed on the basis that because folks enjoyed the first movie so much they‘ll be prepared to put up with almost any old rubbish as long as it more or less repeats that initial experience. The result is as clumsy as it is cynical, and even though I saw it for nothing I still felt short-changed. (TrevorJohnsfon)

From Fri 22 Mar. Glasgow: Cannon Clarkston Road, Cannon The Forge, Odeon, Salon. Edinburgh: Dominion. Odeon, UCI. Central: Allanpark, Caledonian, Cannon. Strathclyde: Cannon, Odeon Ayr, Odeon Hamilton, La Scala, UCl Clydebank, UCl East Kilbride.

baker and struggling to afford books. Sentiriiental and self-consciously heroic. btit nonetheless a masterpiece ofly'rical film-making lidinburgh l-‘ilm (iuild.

I The Naked Gun ( 15) (David Zucker. l'S. Wish) Leslie Nielsen. Priscilla Presley. Ricardo Montalban. 85 mins. Nielsen plays a disaster-prone LA cop assigned to find the men who shot his colleague in a drugs bust. and protect our dear Queen at the same time. while also finding timefor romance with secretary Presley. The makers of Airplane here operate on a similar principle: keep it fast. keepit marvellously dumb. and the comic dividends will eventually flow. Watch out for a great beaver gag and comedy cameos from Arafat. Gaddafi and Gorbachev. Edinburgh: Cameo.

I The Nasty Girl [My Se/rreek/rc/l Made/ten (P(i)(Miehae1Verhoeveri.(iermany. 1W“) l.eria Stol/e. Monika Baumgartner. Michael ( iahl'. Hans-Reinhard Muller l'red Stillkrauth. 03 mins. Superb satire on riioderri (ierriiariy w liicli draws its barbs

from the country 's shameful past. 'l'lie objectionable young woman in question is based on Anja Rosiiius w ho, as a teenager in Bay aria. won local acclaim for heressay writing. and at once embarked upon a project called ‘My Town In ’lhc'lhird Reich'. The film's charm lies not just in the ghastly embarrassment her subsequent research evokes. but in the way

Verhoev en continually undermines the audience's expectations. and never allows the seriousness of his subject tocloudhis sense of humour. Glasgow: (if’l‘. Edinburgh: Filmhouse.

I The Never Ending Story ( PG i (Wolfgang Petersen. L'S “C(iermany.1‘)85)Barret Oliver. Noah Hathaway. Moses Gunn. 9-1 mins. Lonely young boy Bastian starts to read a mysterious book. and is miraculously draw n into the pages to undergo an exciting and dangerous adventure in a land of fantasy . Passable adaptation of the Michael ltiide bestseller. with plenty of cute turry folk to engage the kiddies. Strathclyde: Paisley .»\r‘ts(‘entre.

IThe Neverending Story 2:The Next Chaptertt'ittieorge \lillc-i. t‘s‘. twin Jonathan Brandls. Kenny Morrison. (‘laiissa Burt. John \Ve‘ley Shipp. ‘11) turns Returningtotheniysteriouslaiidot fantasia y la the magic book preserved in Mr (‘oreander's bookshop. Bastian Balthazar Buy t Brandis) meets up with friends old and tiew . arid w lien imagination comes under threat. he once againparticipatesin thestrugglebetyyeeri glititialitic'wi it‘l\til specialellectsand philosophical intricacies make this an entertainingandabsorbinglollowiupto the l‘lSJoitginal Strathclyde. Motlierwell lhcalt'c.

I Nine-And-A-HalfWeekSt lS)l.‘\drian lyric. 1S. 1"“) Mickey Rout kc. Kill) Basinch 113 mins. l)ivorcee Basilich becomes a slay e to loy e and lust yy hen she succuiiibsto the stubbly charriisol coiiiriiodities broker Rourke. liliipty-lieaded and distu:bingdesigner bonkirig. l'dtnburgh: ( aiiieo

I 1900 l 1M 1 Bernardo Bertoluccl.

it it \Vkic'l'. l‘i—Vlii Rtiiic‘ll l)c' \illl. (ier'ard l)epardieu. Burtl ancaster. l)oriiriitriitjue Sarida. Donald Sutherland Beautiful yet violent study of Italian history since the beginning l it the Illth century. told through the llyc'\“l two childhood churns t l )e Mound l)epardieul Bertolucci'srnaiathoiietlort at popular diariia (six—hours 111 total). has been reviled as both glariiorotts epic and lengthy advertisement for the ltahan ('oniriiunist Party. (ilasgoyy. til-'1

I Nuns on the Run l 1:) (.loriathan l yiin. l'S. l‘lS‘il l'ric ldle. Robbicl oltralle. Janet Su/niari ‘15 turns lliere's a little more to this slapstick ct iniedy that: the tillc suggests. idle and ( ‘oltrane. both in top form. play two small little ciot iks yy ho bungle their ltrial heist and find themselves taktrig ieluge disguised as nuns in a convent. l he unpredic table gags that lollow easily surpass the high statidardsol it has prov ed iriiriierisely popular across the

the above-average ( "ally (in lilrii

:\tl.’intictoo. (ilasgow:(irosyerior

I Pacific HaighlSl l5 ) (John Schlesinger. l'S. l‘l‘ill) .\1el;iiile(irilllth. \lalthevy Modirie. Michael Keaton. llppl l lcdren, it): riilns. t‘ieepy suspense thriller with mildly llitchcockiari undertoneshas (irillithand\1odiiieasalovey tioyev couple stillgglingto pay the llililil'dtic‘llli isc'.tltili

is their undesirable new lodgci whoriot

their desirable new 1 ilscohorne

only fails to pay the rent. but also introduces some other unwanted tenants of the slx~legged y at iety \\ ell acted and not without its moments. but rather slender in the plot depai triierit t ilasgoyv ()deon. l‘dinburgh. 1 ll Strathclyde: l'( 'l ( ‘lydcbank. l '( ‘1 last lsilbr rde

I The Pedi Cabdriverst 1* l Sainnio l lung. llong Kong. NS”) ‘5 turns Set in slea/y. turn—ol-the-century Macao. this llrial instalment of the 1 long lsong :iiov ies season is the least lrlyolr iusol the lot (‘entr'ing on the tough lilesly 1c and heady yearningsol a group of tricycle rickshaw drivers. it tells how one oi therii nicetsand becomes engaged to the girl of htsdreaiiis. orin to litid that she is .i callgirl Swallowing his scruples, he prepares to marry her. btit her pinip- gang hasother ideas. (ilasgow. (ii-'1

I Pink Narcissusr lblll'S. 1‘)‘ ‘A swooning horiio—erotic fantasy in tic-dyed psychedelic colours. unavailable foroy er a decade uritilieceritly rediscovered in a New Jersey attic.‘ it says here. What more need w e add ’tilasgiw: Cil’l‘,

I Postcards From The Edger l>itytikc Nicholsd'S.1‘)i)l)ifyjciylSii‘c-c-pShirley MacLaine. Dennis Uuard. (ierie llackmari. Richard l)r'eyfuss 1111 riiiris (ilossy but honest adaptation of ( 'ar'rie l‘isher‘s largely auttibiogr'aphlcal novel of llollvwood hell. cocaine addiction. wakingtipwithstrarigers. apluiiiriictiiig

ilnliliilils

reputation and the degradation of the detox clinic In this case; [jig Hamil c1“ _