{The n o 4Lhappen (see review opposite)

. ‘Lady Wore Black’ indicate the presence olthe heavy metal guitars, pompous semi-literate thought and {.gsub-pballus strutting at what we, ..,euphernisticaiiy, know as Heavy flock. Shocked to the core I was when I put ~ lithe record on the turntable and it turns ifout to be mid-Seventies soul instead. Say the names undoubtedly in the , recordcollection ol Osiris The Band and they’ll be Van McCoy (who gets a

{that this isn’t HM) William de Vaughan, ., The Ohio Players, The Johnston Brothers - maybe even KC and i wouldn’t rule our Earth, Wind and Fire either.

, .llnlortunately ’War On The Builshit‘ “lacks the cut and thrust it’s title implies ‘,-and sits calm and still in the dated, but olten classic sounds oi soul irom ’74 to ’78. Still, it is an album to buy torthose : long Christmas season nights when eolt music is essential-and your sensibilities won’t stretch to an old Sade ornew Simply Bed-LP.

(Andrea Miller) .

' nightmares is to be trapped in an tiel'evator with Margaret Thather, a {thousand spiders and a loop to loop

1“ tape oi this album playing. Obviously - . the new KGB/M15 method oi

» :lnlormation retrieval. (Andrea Miller)

.‘weil have totally lost all sense ot '

L I- very well being young (ish), handsome sand literate but their chosen prolession (does demand talent, ingenuity and. {melodies all oi which'are lackingln .I-i‘Pleasure One'. This album is sterile, -.-;;,antlseptic and worthless - having .,f,honed themselves overthe last live ' gzyears to being able to churn out "icommerclally viable, politically sound '}.product, they have achieved their aims file the extent that they have made *’ themselves both musically and . .- .emtlonaliy redundant. To use a phrase . that is old but good rock iournalese -

E‘ijjvg’tlarious: Cons iracy ol Hope {ilphonogramgt e perlect Christmas 3gp _,' romt point olview oi both

joniy lunction in assuaglng guilt, i’ve

;_ people to help in some small way, to become aware oi a cause or injustice ligand hopelully then be persuaded or‘ slotted into doing more. The revolution,

L as Scott-Heron says, will not be I televised.

all worthwhile songs to have in your . dedication on the sleeve, the only hint

_ active too? (Andrea Miller)

v r carelul and delicate with a labour at

. lovely production on ‘What'Price -~ Su Pollard: Su (K-MOOO ol my worst

has high tech equipment in your lront

Simply Red and suchiike, then you’ll . . probably like this. Maybe not a lot, but

1‘3 Heaven 17: Pleasure One (Virgin ’I,H'ecords it occurs that Heaven 17 may

3-..pleasure as it is applied to pop. it is all ,

' pop. Madonna still doesn’t have a:;.«,‘;.-,,;. look-in in comparison to the seemingly 5

t - in The USA‘ is ultimately disposable r e ~. but ‘Hockbird’ does ieature the v

' Lile’, “Buckle Up’ and -the one i’d tip r ’- tor a hit— ‘Oeyond The Limit’ which [Ethiys ls pure wallpaper. (Andrea Miller) ,

lizconsumer and moral value. Farlrom

“the nieal olemicthatcharl records W p w :. andatieastOebbie Harrystill has

5" always thought" was a good thing lor ' . disposability and outrageous beauty.


About the album, well they have accomplished the teat oi choosing music so obviously accepted that even i like lour ol the tracks (which is what compilations are all about). ‘Strange Pruit’ by Sting, Steve Winwood’s ‘ngher Love‘, Peter Gabriel’s ‘Biko’ and ‘l Believe’ by Tears For Fears are

collection. The other artists are Elton John, Howard Jones, Paul McCartney, Dire Straits, John Cougar Mellencamp, Simple Minds and Bryan Adams, but nobody’s perlect. ‘Conspiracy Oi Hope’ is worth the money— and why not- but why not get

China Crisis: What Price Paradise (Virgin) China Crisis were never going to be the sort oi band to set the world alight, to make small girls scream and young boys strut. They are tastelul,

love spent over the precise and rather

Paradise’ -the price undoubtedly

being,in their instance, how much the! -

production skills oi Langeriand Winstaniey cost them. I I it you are the sort oi music lover who

room - prelerably malt black- or liyou have a CO, Dire Straits records, Sade,

you’ll like it. it, on the other hand, you’re looking lor soul, dazzling ability, raw power or youthlui 138‘! lorget it. (Andrea Miller)

Debbie Harry: Bockblrd (Chrysalis) What a terrible title lor the lirst lady oi

innate taste and ooze oi sensuality that Debbie Harry exudes. ‘French'Kis’SIng -i

possible singles to come - ‘Secret

sounds disconcertineg like ‘Love And Money’.

‘iiockbird’ or, in tact anything in Harry’s iuture, will probably not be clutched to the hearts oi those who swooned over ‘Parallel Lines’ but it’s a dillerent decade irom ‘Rapture’ now,

some at the things that make pop music work-talent, taste, a commercial

Y’can’t have it all y’know . . . (Andrea


0 At last we have news on the metamorphosis ol Edinburgh’s Jailhouse on Calton Road into a proper music venue. Renovations have been going on tor a couple oi months now and the Venue, as" it is to be known, has now doubled its capacity, partly due to the removal oi the island bar and partly due to the opening ol an upper floor. A larger stage means that better-known groups can play in the Venue, when it opens in mid-December. Music will be put on lrom Monday to Thursday inclusive, hopeluiiy gigs by the better bands irom Scotland and iurther alield, while Friday and Saturday nights are being set aside lor alternative cabaret, as it's still known. Any enquiries about bookings, particularly concerning'the cabaret, should be directed to Cosmos Agency, who have moved to 57 St Stephen Street, although the phone number remains 031 226 4527. See also Shortlist.

Beyond the Limit Blondie (see rev ew


0 Get those )lngley bells and Clause

and Clausette outilts on ’cos Christmas '

time is here and every club owner in

Glasgow is just waiting for you to spill

some hard-earned cash their way in between buying that altershave and those socks. Yet another explosion at new clubs have mushroomed in the last

month with the most welcome addition being ‘The Bad Ass Club’, sell-billed as »

the worst bar ever and sporting such

delights as balconies, cosy corners and

a pregnant Statue Oi Liberty. You can

lind The Bad Ass (UK) and its adioining bar/diner. ‘Jamaica‘ under the railway bridge in Clyde Place on the south bank

ol the river. Watch out lor Monday Bad Ass’s which promises some weird and unconventional iorms ol . entertainment. (in other words, phone them now it you’re a lire-eater). o Other new clubs include The Beatbox on Saturdays in Lucilers;'The Hard Sell - all art and hip hop-on Sundays in Fury Murray’s; Spank (just don’t ask) in Lucilers on a Friday as well as the ever gopular Sub Club, Big Mix and Club den.

"o Apart’lrom being THE rm, the ' ' original Celtic soul brother and one oi?

the llnest songwriters ever, Van

. Morrison is pretty weird. Audiences are; *

well used to his laconic (no, i didn't say’ =-.

catatonic) perlormances live hull was

surprised to ilnd that the man is silent ~ to the point ol not speaking even to his "

band. Having had a drummer drop out

because ol illness, the replacement 5 A. ’_ didn’t even see Van the Man until their second number oi the lirst glgi Doesn't . f

this man believe in rehearsal?


The New York Piglunker: Hothouse

(Pasta Spectacular). Three line dance ,

tracks irom ultra-lunky Edinburgh band A

dedicated to ‘spreadlng swine lever

through the country’. And why not? On a good night the Piglunkers can be the I most superb dance band you’ve ever heard, and there’s something about their music that makes you want to

contort your body into mangled shapes. ; while wailliowers look on aghast. They y

can be silly themselves, you’ll be

A relieved to hear. ‘Organ’ is based on a ..

chant commanding us to ‘take oil your ; - trousers and pants’. While dancing

presumably. Well, ltook their advice I v

and now i want to thank the New York Piglunkers lor making me leel one helluva lot better. Thanks lolks. (Mab)


usao, Edinburgh Playhouse

, MissedThe Bloodlire Posse.

Hegretluily, because lor the low , minutes that they joined headliners 0840 on stage lor the lirst oi three encores they brought with them the spark that the rest ol the show had _ _ missed. They looked good tor a start.‘

The Brothers Campbell and the rest ol . the band came a very dowdy second, ' ,

proving beyond doubt that you don’t . have to be obsessed with image and ‘styie’ to be lully-liedged pop stars.

You can in tact do the trick just by

dedicating yoursell to your music and

plugging away at it, even ityour

. lrontmen, your whole band, have the .7.

stage presence olbreezeblocks. i'm .

notknocking them. ihave inthe past, I

and will continue to do so lor as long as

they keep churning out those sluggish " records, but to overcome the handicap '~ 1 that neither hand our songs can project any real emotion at all and be a great live band by virtue at their > ~ prolessionaiism and showmanship,’ ' not through personal magnetism ol erratic liashes ol brilliance, is very impressive. Their audience (very

, young, girls outnumbering boys),was ,

ecstatic belore they even played a note, and U840 gave their tans all they could want, but to win over a harsh and , unlorglving critic, with only the orthodox rockshow treatment was their ' meanest teat. How about some erratic llashes oi brilliance next time? (Mab) 1,